They say just surrender
And yet that has been the hardest thing for me
To release my grip
On things that seem
Like they were made
For grasping and keeping
And protecting
With all my being

Why is it so hard
To relax my mind and body
From clawing and clamoring
and trying
to control everything

It’s all an illusion anyway
and I’ve come to the conclusion that
none of us really have any control
what happens to us
even on a good day
We get to control ourselves
and how we respond
to what happens
and what is taken away
When the ceiling breaks
And the shoe falls through

We only get to control how we relate
And respond to what happens
And that’s it
That’s all we are responsible for

We were never meant to come into this world
To control it or manipulate
What happens here
We were never meant to fight and to grab
What has been freely given
To all of us
And that is our will
And that is love.

The fact is none of us really have a clue how to run this ship
And what’s right for me may be entirely wrong for someone else
and we all want different things
From our experience here
The more I live the more I know this.
The more I live and observe the more I think that
perhaps we were brought here more to be broken
than to be anointed
as Kings and Queens
of this place

Maybe we were brought here more to serve
Than to fight each other
For our spot on this playground
And in the parking lot
Of our local Wal-mart

Maybe we were meant more for connecting and trusting
And holding lightly
The people and the process
That have gotten us
Where we are
And treat it all as a gift
And a privilege
Not so much a right
That we have to constantly fight for

And I think the most beautiful things can happen
When we do the unthinkable and surrender our will
for the wellbeing of another
And we let them have the car or the chance
To get what we wanted
And take the shot or the spot in front of us

And if we and if I could simply remember that
we are all in the same boat
and none of us have any control
over what happens

We are all just here
To be broken
And stripped
Of what is not absolute and unconditional love

It’s all part of the plan
And we are all dependent on each other
We are all at the mercy of
something much greater

And if I could remember that
None of us are getting out of here
With all of our money
And positions and titles
And I would remember that
I can’t take anything with me
I can’t take anything that I’ve acquired
Or grabbed or held onto along the way
It all gets left here in the end
For someone else anyway

I might as well let go of my grasp
Open up my hands
Throw back my heart
and surrender it now.

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