I Believe Her. (But Not Enough to Destroy HIM)

#Ibelieveher. But I also believe that people can change and yes even a young brash boy who assaulted a girl CAN CHANGE.

I understand that people sometimes do things as young adolescent, TEENAGE boys (and girls) that in reality is not who they actually ARE. Sometimes they do stupid, foolish, even hurtful things in high school that they regret later in life because they eventually learned and became better.

We generally applaud them. Unless of course they are running for office of some kind. Then we MUTILATE them to death with our public opinions and destroy them along with their families’ reputation, children, pets, and careers for the rest of eternity.

Thing is, people change. I am not the same person I was in high school, or even college. I know some idiotic boys from years past who have turned into some mighty fine, respectful men. Maybe you are one of them. That doesn’t make you a horrible unfit person that should forever be disqualified for any position of good or honor in our society.

I’m not as concerned with WHAT he did/didn’t do in his youth. I wanna know how he acts toward women NOW. What is his response to this woman who is accusing him, NOW? Is he compassionate? Is he humble and kind? Is he brash towards women NOW?

(AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin)

I’m so sick of things like this being used as weapons for political purposes. I’m so tired of people calling each other liars (and ‘monsters’ and sexists and rapists), just because it feels good in the moment to do so or because it’s the popular opinion of a certain group or party. I’m so weary of living in a society where the loudest and the harshest and the one with the most money, wins.

Like, what have we become??? Are we suddenly like animals with absolutely no rationality or reason anymore? Do we not even have some small measure of understanding for each other, or is it just a shouting match now until one recedes because the fighting has taken its toll and their lives and their families have been utterly destroyed???

I’d like to live in a world where for once, the KINDEST one wins.

Maybe I’m being too idealistic, but I happen to believe that we as humans have the most capacity out of any (species) to understand and think rationally and I just believe we can do WAY BETTER than what is being played out in media right now.

#Ibelieveher. But that doesn’t mean I’m calling HIM a liar. There is way too much gray in this story, for that.

#Ibelieveher. But I haven’t heard his side of the story yet. I am anxious to see how he responds to this. I hope that whether he did it or not, he responds with humility and kindness, because honestly (outside of a conviction) that is the thing that matters NOW.

I take it seriously when a woman says she was assaulted and that’s why I believe her.

But I also take it seriously when a people/group of people use said ‘assault’ to defame a person before he is ever tried in court, just to advance their own selfish and political agendas. And honestly, if you are one of those people who finds it fun to attack or make a mockery out of another person’s character (man OR woman) without ever knowing them personally or before seeing all the facts, then I will promptly block you and not hear anything else you have to say. Just because we believe one, does not mean we have to hate the other. Just because we hear one side of the story doesn’t mean there is no other side or that it’s not worth being heard.

It’s always worth being heard.

Unfortunately, we live in an era where society can literally destroy an entire family with ONE Twitter or Facebook post, and if that is you, if you are the kind that rushes to judgment and is crass and mean in your posts about PEOPLE, especially people you don’t know, then I will NOT have any part of it. I won’t engage in this kind of destructive rhetoric if that makes me the most unpopular kid on the block.

I want truth just as much as the next person, but I am not willing to dissect an innocent man’s character in order to find it.

Remember this is America and he is STILL INNOCENT until proven guilty.

#Ibelieveher, but let’s give the guy a chance. First of all, a chance to have changed, and to be a respectable human now. Let’s give him the decency of due process before we hang his entire family on the gallows of public opinion. And at the very least, let’s give him a chance to tell HIS side of the story.

This is America, and we are humans, after all.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *